Always make sure you...

...take a picture of the men that you help to kick out of a pub before being brutally stabbed.

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The aftermath...

 

Yes, those are tide marks, click for larger size.

 

 

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Gangland dreaming

 Comes with picture hat and pastel gloves with floral trim, shoes, and hose.

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Big boys bugger up then profusely apologise

 

We're sorry

 

 

 

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Yay! A new source of chuckles!

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Grokster doesn't pirate software, people pirate software.

Pretty soon we'll all be clicking check boxes along-side statements like:

 

Although this application is extremely fast, useful and efficient for distributing copyrighted material like the latest music, movies, games and software we stress that you please DO NOT use this application for that. Thanks.

 

 

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Google maps places of wonkiness

The BT tower blowing in the breeze:

http://maps.google.co.uk/maps?ll=51.521233,-0.138788&spn=0.007113,0.010664&t=k&hl=en

 

The big blue(!?) bouncy british museum:

http://maps.google.co.uk/maps?ll=51.519377,-0.126665&spn=0.007113,0.010664&t=k&hl=en

 

Kensington desert?

http://maps.google.co.uk/maps?ll=51.506996,-0.171189&spn=0.028453,0.042658&t=k&hl=en

 

What colour is the Thames really?

http://maps.google.co.uk/maps?ll=51.503134,-0.030663&spn=0.014226,0.021329&t=k&hl=en

 

I mean REALLY what colour is the Thames?   

http://maps.google.co.uk/maps?ll=51.509228,0.157328&spn=0.056906,0.085316&t=k&hl=en

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Don't fuck with nerds

Did a search for WiFi networks and, like a minor miracle, found one. It was the shop's. It was unsecured. It was perfect. DHCP was turned off, but guessing that they had left the router set to its defaults, only stopping along the way to require static IP's, I gave myself a 192.168.1.x address, plugged in my own values for DNS, set the gateway to 192.168.1.1, and was up and running immediately.

 

Bloody amateurs.

 

 

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One finds it is not user friendly.

Sony products are too much trouble - The Queen

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Glasto brings new meaning to...

...I was just bursting!

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Prepare for some bad lip-synching...

...and oh-yeah-right-that-can-happen-action!

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You'll never play Tetris again.

Watch this and feel forever inferior.

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Go on... get sucked into Honda's viral marketing...

Hate something, change something, make something better!

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Excel as a database

If you wanted a database why didn't you just use Word?

 

 

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Whaddya mean we got no lamb chop orders comin in?

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/asia-pacific/4114556.stm

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Oh wise one...

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What do you get when you cross Flickr with Google Maps?

Gee, that's not far from here...

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How to scare the hell of of a kid...

...make their nightmares come true!

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Frustration pt II

Hapland 2

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Now you can make you computer say rude words...

...with perfect allocution.

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Tornado and rainbow

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So what is it I hve to do?

Um shoot the bridge, the bell, open the door, no, shoot the bell, open the door, drop the bridge, blow up the bell, no, shoot the man, ring the bell, open the door, no no No NO NOO!

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All together now...

Maria hee - maria hoo - maria ha ha

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Ok another one...

You may have been buggered already but how about some bulls playing chicken with a sheep-shagger?

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I don't know who TBS are...

...but their ads are pretty darn funny!

 

Ink Name Strange Fruit Wings

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One last one for the day

Now we wait...

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Criticising these people is like...

...booing at the special Olympics

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I have 80 years of media to watch on my iPod!

I don't call myself a techno-phobe more of a tech-oh-for-fuck's-sake-why?

 

Mr Pait thinks that although many people are already living an accumulative terabyte lifestyle, in about five years PCs will have five terabytes of storage on board.

One terabyte is the equivalent of 1,024Gb, enough to hold more than 240,000 songs at the standard encoding rate for digital music files.

 

So on my 5 tera-byte disc I shall have 1,200,000 songs at 3 mins apiece thats 6.84 years of continuous unrepeated music.

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Gaping asshole

 

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Is it a bird, is it a plane?

No! It is water-squirting-out-of-array-of-large-bottles-man.

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Why are you sneezing uncontrollably and your eyes streaming conti nuously?

It's to keep the elephants away. 

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Collected wisdom

What Homer learned.

 

What Roseanne learned.

 

Everyone else has learned stuff also.

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Hi son, watcha been downloading?

Oh not much mum, just some stuff for homework.

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You stole my virtual sword! I KILL YOU!

A Shanghai online gamer has been given a suspended death sentence for killing a fellow gamer.

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Two wheels bad

Four wheels good.

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YASW/STPT

Yet another Star Wars/Star Trek Piss Take

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Next US Mars lander gets go-ahead

Gee lets improve our previous efforts of sending two remote control cars to Mars by sending a coffee table instead. Let's hope it doesn't land on a rock and topple over.

 

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